An Eltham man has been hiding behind the flimsy premise that he pees in the shower because it saves water and is good for the environment. When challenged on his behaviour by friends, Hamish Oliver had previously insisted that his motivation was purely based on water conservation, when the truth is that he’s too lazy to urinate separately in the toilet.

While some studies claim that up to 80% of us urinate in the shower, the action is still a taboo subject in some friendship groups. After an awkward conversation in the lunch room at work last week, colleagues have been giving Oliver disapproving side glances for the last couple of days, after he admitted to all in attendance that he doesn’t actually give a stuff about the environment. 

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, Oliver said, “I just thought it was time to confess, but I suppose I picked the wrong audience. I mean I hardly know some of these people, and now I’ve been ostracised in the office. They all think I’m a filthy pig, some of them don’t even want to be in the same lift as me. So much for the idea that honesty is the best policy.”