A local penny-pincher says he’s abandoned café culture and embraced service station coffee, making full use of the many cut-price offerings available across Melbourne. Watsonia’s very own Daniel Manson says that the move is saving him valuable money and the taste is “not half bad”, whatever that means.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle about his bold lifestyle change, Manson said, “Yeah mate, I’ve just really embraced it. Most of the servos around Melbourne only charge about a buck or two for a decent-sized coffee, and they’re not half bad. Plus, I don’t have to experience that awkward shame of the barista watching me pour three sugars into me flat white each morning. The machine does not judge me.”

Service station coffee has experienced something of a niche following in recent years, mainly off the back of Eddie Perfect’s glowing endorsement two years ago, and in direct correlation to the rising price of takeaway coffees across Melbourne and its surrounding suburbs. According to Manson, “When that Eddie Perfect bloke gave it the okay, I was immediately on board. You know he played Warnie in a musical once, yeah?”