Even though the once popular stick figure family car stickers have thankfully been removed from society’s zeitgeist, their impact on family life has continued to be felt for many. Greensborough family, ‘the Baileys’, have been rocked by recent backlash to their mother’s insistence on keeping the stickers on the family wagon after four long years.

While Mrs Bailey remains happy with her mobile phone and handbag persona, Timmy (11 years old) has spoken out about his depiction as a little pirate. He claims, “when I was seven I went through a bit of a pirate phase – couple of months, maybe five months at the absolute most. But I quickly grew out of it, and now I’m 11 I couldn’t give a stuff about pirates, my whole lifestyle has changed. Yet there it is, shouting to every car on the road, ‘the kid in this car is a little pirate’. I’m over it. Mum needs to let go.”

Timmy’s bold stance against the family’s self-appointed supreme leader has encouraged others to step forward. Madeleine (15 years old) has said “I’m up there for all to see as a stupid fairy. It was okay when I was 11, and it will probably be a cool ironic thing when I’m 19 and going to a music festival or something, but right now I’m bang smack in the middle of a real no fairy go zone. Like, the stickers just have to go.”

Mr Bailey has even stepped forward, saying “There’s a whole lot more to me than some goofy looking moron holding an egg slide and cooking a BBQ. I mean, I run a successful financial planning business, I play mid-week squash, and I dabble on the acoustic guitar, but how are you supposed to encapsulate all of that in one stupid stick figure? You just can’t.”

Mrs Bailey was contacted by The Watsonia Bugle and told of these grievances, but refused to comment in detail, other than offering “I’ll think about it”.

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