A yet to open kebab store in Watsonia has changed the definition of the word “soon” to roughly five months. The change came this week after the “Opening Soon” sign that had been on the shop window since January was replaced with an “Opening May” sign. 

While some cynical observers claimed the new sign may actually mean that the store “may” be opening at some point, the general assumption is that the store will open next month. Despite their total disregard for common language conventions, the opening of the new store is keenly anticipated by local diners who are generally very well catered for on the Main Street of Watsonia. 

In total, the main strip is home to three fish and chip shops, three pizza joints, a charcoal chicken, some Thai, a Subway (Eats Fresh), the world’s best Noodle store, and two bakeries. The kebab store promises to be popular, but just hope that when you order your dinner there they don’t say it will be ready “soon”.