The entire state of Queensland has breathed a sigh of relief as the rampant confusion surrounding daylight saving has ended for another year. Notoriously against arguably one of humanity’s greatest inventions, Queenslanders often treat residents of the southern states with a suspicion usually reserved for witchcraft during medieval times.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, long time Queensland resident Rebecca Timmins said, “I’m just relieved to be honest. It’s very confusing for the cows, my curtains don’t know how to cope, and when I call my relos down south I’ve got no idea what time it is down there. Those smug southerners think they’ve got it all worked out, but who do they think they are messing with nature like that?”