A Greensborough man has conveniently forgotten a childhood of trick or treating by bemoaning the “Americanisation of Halloween” this morning in a lengthy Facebook rant. Ben Grundy, who spent many a spring evening walking his friendly neighbourhood with siblings to collect free lollies, refused to let this otherwise pleasant memory cloud an opportunity to jump onto an over-crowded bandwagon.

During Grundy’s lengthy condemnation of the aforementioned “Americanisation”, he wrote, “I mean have a look at the shops these days, they’re full of Halloween stuff. This has never been an Aussie thing, it’s just another example of bloody American rubbish creeping into our culture. Don’t get sucked in to it.”

Grundy’s stance was revealed to be on shaky ground when, earlier today, his elder sister posted a flashback photo on Facebook of him, as a child, standing in a crudely constructed devil costume with a tote bag full of lollies. He reportedly untagged himself and has turned his phone off for the afternoon.