Drunken revellers from the nearby suburb of Greensborough are reportedly still trying to find a new monument to climb on when intoxicated after the loss of the noble steed that used to sit atop the Horseland store on Main Street. While the horse has not been available for night time rides for a couple of years now, since Horseland closed and took their mascot with them, local drinkers are yet to find a suitable alternative on which to express their drunken delight and sense of adventure.

One such drinker, who identified himself as Chris*, told The Watsonia Bugle, “It’s been real tough mate, to be honest with you. I used to love getting up on ‘Whitey’ for a bit of a yahoo and a laugh with the boys, but there’s just no suitable alternative these days. I’d give me left nut for just one more ride. It’d be epic.”

One of Chris’s mates, who was so protective of his privacy that he even refused to be given a fake name, said “It’s like that old song says mate, ‘You don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone’. If we’d known that beautiful horse was going to leave one day, we would’ve been up on there once a week, but instead we just rode her occasionally. I still kick meself to this day for not going on more adventures.”

* Name changed to protect identity.