A local man has boldly claimed that the manner in which he exited his family seemed much easier than Harry and Megan’s current move to tone down their royal commitments. Watsonia man Brett Hamilton said that his self-described “Brettxit” was over in a matter of hours, and never once featured in the tabloid media.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, Hamilton said, “Yeah mate, mine was heaps easier. I just got munted at Christmas lunch and started delivering a few home truths. Nek minnit, none of them want anything to do with me. I was sad for a day or two, but then I realised it was probably for the best. C’est la vie mate.”

While Hamilton conceded that it was still early days in his excommunication, he believes this one will be long-lasting. He said, “Yeah man, I’ve pissed a few of them off in the past, but I really went for it this time. I don’t think Aunty Doris will ever recover from what I said about her stupid little Pomeranian.”