Use of LYNX Africa deodorant has apparently dropped to an all-time low, as self-isolation prevents local lotharios from wandering out into the wild to strut their stuff. Recent retail summaries indicate that sales of the previously popular Africa scent are down 85% from the same time last year, registering a rare blip for a product that has dominated the men’s grooming market for over two decades now.
Sources from within the anti-perspirant industry claim the unusually low sales figure is indicative of the temporary closure of traditional “pick up venues” such as pubs, discotheques, gyms and local RSLs. In addition to those closures, other popular meeting places such as Watsonia Train Station and Greensy Plaza have reported markedly lower visitor numbers in recent weeks.
One local bachelor conceded that his LYNX Africa use had declined significantly in the last fortnight. Will Samson said, “Yeah man, if there’s no chicks around to impress, what’s the point? I may as well just spray on some Rexona Sport, just like my Dad does.”
The Watsonia Bugle 