A horribly misguided man has allegedly purchased new baby bottles with the intention of giving them to his partner for her first Mothers Day. Foolishly trusting the promotional layout of his local supermarket, Darren Jenson saw the bottles alongside more traditional gifts such as slippers, mugs, chocolate and pyjamas.

Appreciating the practicality of such a gift, Jenson bought a couple of bottles, and then proudly told his mates about the idea on WhatsApp last night. But he says he was hounded for the left-field selection, with more than one of Jenson’s mates openly daring him to present the bottles to his partner this Sunday.

Seeking clarification on the issue, Jenson contacted The Watsonia Bugle for advice. In presenting his case, he said, “She’s a fairly practical kind of chick, so I reckon she’ll really appreciate it. She always saying she wishes she had more bottles so we didn’t have to be washing them all the time. Plus they were all in the Mothers Day section at Greensy Safeway, so it must be a legit option. Surely?”