Peter Siddle has boldly justified his upcoming move to Tasmania by explaining his new set of teeth means he’s only about 70% Victorian now anyway. The move was officially announced this morning, with the veteran fast bowler set to leave the garden state after an incredibly distinguished 15-year career in navy blue, leaving more than a few local fans a little heavy in the heart.

However, Siddle has attempted to ease that sadness by reassuring supporters of Victorian cricket that after he invested in a new set of chompers a few years ago he’s really only about 70% of Victorian origin these days. A source close to Siddle said, “Yeah mate, ever since he got the teeth done, it’s hard to track exactly how much of him is Victorian anyway. Who knows where they sourced that new set from, but my guess would be offshore somewhere.”

The seemingly overnight improvement in the condition of Siddle’s teeth was the subject of widespread suspicion among cricket fans a few years ago, with online forums ablaze with rumours for many months. And while this latest confirmation from within the Siddle camp seems to put to rest many of those queries, it’s unlikely to soften the blow for many Victorians who are devastated about the loss of our lion-hearted bowler.

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