A recent study has managed to answer a question that has plagued society for many years: in a row of cubicles, which contains the least used toilet? While people generally attempt to access the least-used toilet in a delusional attempt to remain some semblance of personal hygiene in a public toilet, no peer-validated study had ever forensically tracked cubicle visiting patterns in public toilets across the nation to provide the one true answer.
In a conclusive report, the study identified the second cubicle as the most used cubicle, presumably because most users are under the false impression that everyone goes for the first stall. This misconception has led to a bitter irony, as those trying to avoid a well-used cubicle end up feeling that unsettling warmth of a recently occupied toilet seat. Interestingly, the second-most used cubicle is the last one, meaning that in the case of a two-cubicle row, the second and last cubicle receives 90% of the patronage.
So, take our word for it, next time you’re trying to choose a throne, take the first cubicle. Science has proven that that is the best choice. Unless, of course, heaps of people read this article, then you’re really screwed.
The Watsonia Bugle 