A local man has claimed that Lockdown 2.0 has almost got him bored enough to repaint the inside of his house… almost. Chris Thompson made the dangerous admission last night while laying on the couch watching the footy, after absent-mindedly gazing around his living room and simultaneously contemplating the limited activities available to him this weekend.

Thompson claims he has been fielding questions from his wife ever since, contacting The Watsonia Bugle this morning to seek a third-party ruling on the matter. He said, “First thing this morning she was asking if I wanted to start today. I was like, ‘Ah, not sure we can go to Bunnings today, Love. Paint isn’t exactly an essential item. Maybe we should wait a few weeks until the COVID numbers are down a bit.’ But I’m afraid the horse might’ve bolted already. I’m in strife here, real strife.”

Thompson says one vague comment after a few beers on the couch on a Friday night wouldn’t hold up in a court of law, and is urging caution this morning. He said, “All I said was that I was thinking about it. That doesn’t mean I’m actually bored enough to do it… yet. And besides, there’s still a few weeks of lockdown to go, so there’s no need to rush into these things.”