A local man has openly suggested that May is the perfect month to abstain from drinking alcohol, controversially challenging two major annual fundraising events that take place in other months of the year. Daniel Gumbleton of Greensborough believes that, if you had to choose, the month of May is definitely the best month to avoid drinking booze.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle about his theory, Gumbleton said, “Febfast? Are you kidding me? February is prime drinking weather. Ocsober? No way. Summer’s on the way, the cricket’s on, perfect time to crack a beer. But in May, nothing happens. They should do one and call it ‘May I Have a Glass of Water’ or something like that.”

While Gumbleton bases most of his theory around the weather, he also believes that a number of other seasonal factors have influenced his claims. He said, “It’s not just the weather, mate. I mean, in June and July you can crack a bottle of red and it’s almost as good as a few beers in the sun in the middle of Summer. The thing is, by the time May swings around, most of us have had a pretty decent crack on the turps over Easter and that. Tag that onto the back of Summer and the start of the footy season and, deep down, you know you’re due for a rest.”