A recent top-secret livestock exchange between animals from Collingwood Children’s Farm and Edendale Farm has uncovered an odd disparity between the interests of creatures at the two locations. Staff at both locations reported regular awkwardness between the animals whenever they were interacting with each other, with further investigation uncovering musical snobbery as the source of the problems.

An anonymous staff member from Edendale Farm told The Watsonia Bugle, “At first we were all for the animal exchange, but the animals just never got along. To be honest, the Collingwood animals were a bit too pretentious for Edendale. They kept asking our animals if they were into all these different bands that our guys had never even heard of. Then there would just be these extended silences in the paddocks. It was horrible.”

The morning coffee orders also proved to be quite problematic. The same Edendale staff member said, “Our guys are generally just a flat white and latte kind of crowd. But the Collingwood animals were coming up with all kinds of complicated requests. It was just too much. How can you expect us to remember those orders without writing them down?”