According to Instagram, which we trust with our lives, doing yoga on a stand up paddle board is apparently now a thing, and one Watsonia man in particular is not happy about it. So unhappy, in fact, that he has taken to Facebook to condemn the new trend in a withering tirade that has drawn quite a following amongst his friends.
The man, Brent Findlay, posted his statement earlier in the week, starting with “So now people are doing yoga on them SUPs, and this is pretty much everything that is wrong with the world right now. Who are these idiots standing on their heads while floating on a large body of water? There might be a slight added benefit to doing yoga on the water, but this whole thing just screams the ‘me, me, me’ attitude of the online generation.” Clearly missing the irony of complaining about the trend online, he then went on to attack a couple of other social media stereotypes before ending his post with the time-honoured “Rant over”.
As of this morning, the post had attracted over 100 likes, as it spread to friends of friends of friends. Emboldened by the extra coverage, Findlay remained bullish when contacted by The Watsonia Bugle last night. He told us, “well we’ve really showed ‘em haven’t we, bunch of jerks. I’m just an old fashioned kind of guy, so I like me yoga conducted on a mat on top of a fixed surface, and me SUPing conducted with both feet firmly on the board and struggling to stay upright like the rest of us mere mortals. Hopefully my brave stance will put an end to this disturbing trend.”