While the long-term benefits of removing the level crossing in Rosanna are indisputable, the short-term pain of buses replacing trains on the Hurstbridge Line is causing significant pain and stress for regular train commuters heading to and from the city. The anger that arises from these commuters when they hear the dreaded term has driven local linguist Danielle Formosa to grant “buses replaces trains” with temporary swear word status in the English language.

While such a concession is rare in modern times, Formosa insists that these circumstances are equally rare and, therefore, deserve this kind of formal recognition. She said, “It feels like this has been going on for ages, and there’s no definite conclusion in sight, so we felt we needed to give the long suffering commuters something to cling to. Next time you accidentally hit your thumb with a hammer, you can now yell ‘buses replacing trains’ and it will immediately relieve some of your pain. Try it. Seriously.”

Beyond casual use in the local vernacular, the new status of the term may cause problems for Metro, with a raft of older commuters with their pens at the ready to write letters of complaint for hearing swear words over the loud speaker each day at the train station. One such commuter, Mavis Kennedy, told The Watsonia Bugle, “Well, if it’s officially a swear word now I definitely don’t want to be hearing it on the airwaves. I catch the train into town every second Thursday just to visit Myer and look at their wares. This bus scenario is added a terrible amount of time to my trip.”

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