A Watsonia man has broken the silent code of yoga devotees by revealing to his instructor exactly what goes through his mind during his weekly class. The man, Hugh Williams, made the startling admission after a class last week, and his instructor was left feeling a mixture of shock, disgust and amusement.

It turns out that instead of repeating a meditative mantra in his mind throughout the hour-long class, Hugh spends the whole time repeating the lines, “Don’t fart. Don’t fart. Don’t fart. Don’t fart. You want me to do what with my leg? Oops, don’t fart. Don’t fart.” While Hugh’s instructor is no stranger to a mid-class passing of wind, she admitted she was disappointed that she was unable to transport his mind to a more peaceful place during their regular sessions.

The instructor, who requested anonymity, told The Watsonia Bugle, “I understand where he’s coming from, but I really pride myself on providing my clients with a safe and welcoming environment, one where they don’t have to feel the constraints of regular society. While I’m not encouraging a flatulence free for all, I just don’t feel that Hugh’s inner dialogue is allowing him to receive the full benefits of class.”