In what is believed to be the first case of its kind, the ambient temperature inside an office today has been declared suitable by all, with not one complaint aired about it being too cold or hot. While the inhabitants of the office were all initially shocked, they soon embraced the utopian experience and productivity soared, until a couple of people started brainstorming something else to moan about.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle about the rare occurrence, one team member from the inner city office said, “I couldn’t believe it at first, I mean there’s always a few outliers on this topic, but we legit went to at least four hours today without a single complaint. And we’re on a floor with over 30 people in an open plan office. It was remarkable.”

However, the pessimists in the office were eventually proven correct when at 3.25pm Janet from HR said in an obviously loud way, “Oh, it’s a bit hot in here isn’t it. Who turned the heater on?” The rhetorical question was met with an audible sigh from 80% of the office, of whom all know there’s no such thing as a “heater” (it’s actually a split system), while the remaining 20% chuckled slightly because they know they get off a bit on the daily climate debate. Things returned to normal and the office space became just like every other one in the world.