A 39-year-old man from Montmorency is counting down the days until he’s eligible for Over 40s night at the Crimson Coconut. At last count, Ben Donaldson has only 93 days to go before he qualifies for such an exciting Saturday night at a suburban roller rink turned red hot pick up joint.

According to Donaldson, a number of his mates are already cashing in at the Crimson Coconut on a weekly basis, and he’s ready to get his hands dirty. He said, “Mate, I tried Tinder for a bit and it wasn’t bad, but things dried up after a while. Plus I’m more of an old fashioned kind of guy. I lost me virginity out the front of that joint when Grinspoon played at the Fruitbowl, so wouldn’t it be cool if I met me second wife there?!”

When we contacted management at the Coconut, they wouldn’t be drawn on how strict the age policy was actually enforced, but Donaldson insisted he was a stickler for the rules. He said, “oh yeah, I guess I could just get in anyway but rules are there for a reason. And you know what they say: good things come to those who wait.”