A local boring person has spent much of this morning telling everyone that today feels like a Wednesday. Obviously struggling to come to terms with last Monday’s public holiday, Karen Symonds has remarked about her day confusion to people as diverse as her husband, barista, lift companions, and the office dog.

She has even taken the extraordinary step on contacting The Watsonia Bugle to share her condition. She said, “I mean, it just feels like a Wednesday doesn’t it? You know, Hump Day, haha, the middle of the working week. At least it means the weekend is closer, I guess.”

After nodding politely and offering a few stock standard responses we investigated further by contacting an anonymous colleague. The unnamed person said, “She just won’t shut up about it, and it’s doing my head in. I’m real close to emailing HR about this. It’s workplace harassment.”