A local footballer is reportedly running out of excuses for not attending pre-season training since the Christmas break, as pressure mounts from both his couch and his teammates. While Nathan Fleming is notorious for poor attendance at pre-season training, this year’s effort is believed to be his worst, as rumours being to swirl about whether he is dedicated enough to play First XVIII football this season for the Watsonia Wombats.

An anonymous source from within the Wombats contacted The Watsonia Bugle to voice their concerns about the current situation. They said, “He’s never trained the house down before about March each year, but this is unprecedented. Normally he even makes a few token appearances before Christmas, but this year he’s been a complete no-show.”

The source then began speculating about the reasons for Fleming’s absence from the training track. They said, “His social media presence has been a flurry of shots of him drinking beers under big blue skies. But he’s always been fairly committed to the can, so it can’t be that. I reckon he’s got a missus now, so mid-week he’s just snuggled up on the couch, getting more and more addicted to Married at First Sight.”