Despite making the exact same empty promise on this day last year, Heidelberg millennial Sam Flanagan has boldly proclaimed that he will come for a drink at the Dan O’Connell Hotel on a day other than St Patrick’s Day. Full of Guinness and gently swaying on the lawn to the tunes of an Irish band other than U2, Sam has embraced his distant Irish ancestry and is enjoying a wonderful afternoon on the sesh.

Sam, who has only ventured inside the actual Hotel to couple of times to take a piss, said “it’s just got such a great vibe, I can totes see myself sitting in the front bar with all the locals, chewing the fat, and watching the traffic crawl down Alexandra Parade”. Seemingly ignoring the persistent eye rolling from his mates, Sam also said “yeah, I’m definitely coming back. They’ve got trivia on Wednesday nights, and a bloody steak and parma night every Monday. Too easy!”

When Sam’s mate Burnsey mentioned that the same promise had been made last year with absolutely no follow up, Sam dismissed the thinly veiled swipe as his integrity, saying “yeah yeah, I know mate, but I just got busy you know. I can’t be everywhere at once. But it’s happening this year, I promise. It’s ‘The Dan’ boys! The fuckin’ Dan!”