A local loudmouth with a penchant for excessively drinking at local sporting events has expressed his concern that the AFL’s so-called “Behavourial Awareness Officers” will trickle down from the upper echelons of the game and commence work at local footy games. Keen Watsonia Wombats fan, Darren Lenton, has spent the past week looking over his shoulder, genuinely concerned that he won’t be able to carry on like an absolute pillock at this weekend’s round of matches.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, Lenton said, “Oh mate, I’m a bit nervous to be honest. I can be a bit of a jerk at the local footy after a few cans. If them Behavourial Awareness blokes are at local footy this weekend I could be stuffed. This is not good.”

Lenton even tried to hide behind the tired old excuse that the game is for the fans in a failed attempt to excuse his typically anti-social behaviour. He said, “The game is for the fans, mate. Without us, there is no game. I pay me 10 buck entry fee and put half a week’s wages over the can bar, I should be able to say what I want, you know.”

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