Melbourne’s first ever “butthole sunning” studio is reportedly set to open in right here in Watsonia, with its proprietors claiming that the practice will revolutionise the entire wellness industry. The somewhat controversial concept basically involves exposing your, ahem, butthole to direct sunlight for 30 seconds each day to get your daily dose of Vitamin D and absorb enough vital energy to power through your busy schedule. If you think we’re making this up, we’re not. It’s a thing. Check it out here.

While an exact location is yet to be approved, the team behind Melbourne’s first ever “butthole sunning” studio claim they’re very close to obtaining council approval for a premises near Watsonia’s thriving retail precinct. A spokesperson for the group said, “Yeah, hopefully we have sign off by early next week, and then we should be able to open and run classes before the end of the year. We’ll need to retrofit the building that we plan on using, but that shouldn’t take any more than a month.”

Despite remaining relatively tight-lipped about the specifics of what the studio will offer, the source claimed that both group and individual classes would be on offer, as well as private booths for those seeking additional privacy. The source said, “Obviously solariums are illegal in this state, so the trickiest part for us is harnessing the sun’s natural energy while also ensuring the modesty of our clients. But we’ve been working with international consultants to make sure we get that part 100% correct. It’s really exciting.”

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