A Greensborough woman is giving serious consideration to changing her regular coffee order out of fear that genuine coffee aficionados look upon her as basic and vanilla. The potential change up comes after a thorough three-year apprenticeship, starting with two sugars in a cappuccino and currently settling with a flat white… no sugar. 

The 29-year-old woman, Bec Jones, says spending the working week in Fitzroy has exposed her to a wide variety of coffee orders, well beyond her more conventional flat white. She said, “Depending on the cafe I’m in, sometimes I just whisper my order now, because I know they’re all secretly judging me. If I evolve to a more complicated and nuanced order, I’ll earn the respect of complete strangers and may even win over my favourite, if not gruff, barista.”

Jones said the move would be more complicated than it seems, saying “It’s a bit of a balancing act really. A new order might gain coffee cred in the inner north, but could have me branded a snob or a wanker in the outer suburbs. If I order a piccolo with soy milk steamed to 67 degrees Celsius at a cafe in Greensy Plaza the locals will eat me alive.”