Watsonia is planning for a bold move up the suburb rankings by the year 2120 after another disappointing result in the Domain Liveable Melbourne study announced earlier this week. The study, which claims to rank each suburb on 17 indicators, placed Watsonia 119 out of 307 Melbourne suburbs, disappointing many local residents.

Despite a slight increase from 132nd place in the last iteration of the study, Watsonia’s people are perennial high achievers, always setting their sights on the next horizon. Seemingly inspired by the comments section of our article announcing the recent ranking, local residents have commenced planning for a big move up the rankings by 2120.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, a spokesperson behind the planning said, “We always seem to lose points for being too far from the beach. Well, by the time global warming does it’s thing, Watsonia will be a beachside suburb. Imagine how many fish and chips shops we’ll have then?!”

While other aspects of the presumably multi-pronged approach remain closely guarded, it seems a detailed succession plan needs to be put in place, especially considering the long-term nature of the project. The spokesperson said, “Yeah, we’re obviously playing the long game here, so we’ll be planning well ahead with generations of passionate Watsonia advocates.”