A local man that regularly runs to catch his morning train from Watsonia Station is unsure whether that incidental exercise makes him exempt from wearing a face mask. One of the very few local residents still catching the train into the city each morning for work, Ben Hamilton is now seeking clarification on exactly when he needs to be wearing his mask after the new rules came in at midnight last night.

Speaking to The Watsonia Bugle, Hamilton said, “Mate, I’m a shocker. I’m always running late for that train in the morning, so most of the time I have to make a dash. I know if you’re going for a run you don’t have to wear your mask, but do you have to be in activewear to qualify for that exemption? I need to find this out.”

When asked how he could still be running late most mornings despite less traffic on the roads and more car parking being available at the station, Hamilton said, “Don’t patronise me, champ. I’m a busy man, and there simply aren’t enough hours in the day for me to get my things done. I’ve lost a lot of personal freedoms over the last few months, don’t take the mad dash for Platform 1 away from me. It’s the only time I feel truly alive each day.”