A local wife has callously dismissed her husband’s claim that his latest shed mishap was all 2020’s fault, using the situation to encourage him to take responsibility for his own actions. Watsonia North woman Kellie Stephenson pretty much gave her husband Gerry zero sympathy yesterday afternoon, after he accidentally super glued his fingers together whilst trying to repair a broken kitchen chair.

Contacting The Watsonia Bugle in a seemingly desperate attempt to elicit some sympathy for his injury, Gerry said, “I was genuinely distressed. I mean, my fingers were fused together, and all she could do was tell me what I’d done wrong. Then, later on, when I mused that 2020 just wasn’t on my side, she said, ‘Don’t blame 2020 champ, you’ve been doing stupid shit way longer than just this year.’ I was staggered by her heartless response.”

While Gerry heroically managed to pry his fingers apart following the incident, he says he’s still trying to recover from his wife’s remarks. He said, “Google suggests that the glue residue on my fingers will eventually peel off, but Kellie’s words will stay with me for much longer. I mean, what’s she on about? Everyone else is blaming 2020 for bad stuff, why can’t I pile on too? Plus, she champed me. 2020 can get stuffed.”

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