A local hipster has spent the last 24 hours spruiking the benefits of Watsonia’s boutique water supply, claiming it has superior health benefits to the water available in our surrounding suburbs. The move comes after Friday’s accidental discovery that Watsonia seems to have a different water supply to the neighbouring communities of Greensborough, Bundoora, Eltham and Montmorency.

Since Friday, Watsonia resident Caleb McDaniel has been telling anyone that’ll listen that Watsy water is a bit like that indie band he listened to way before they starting get airplay on FM radio. Speaking to The Watsonia Bugle about our suburb’s exclusive water, McDaniel said, “Yeah, you’ve probably, like, never heard of it before. It’s not mainstream. It’s, like, this kind of boutique thing that’s handcrafted and only available in Watsonia. And maybe Macleod and Rosanna. But mostly Watsonia.”

Apart from the apparent absence of toxins that can cause gastro-like symptoms if you ingest them, McDaniel believes Watsy water also has additional health benefits. He said, “I heard a whisper that our water is different because we’re more of a heritage suburb, meaning we get our supply from Sugarloaf Reservoir. That region is renowned for its fresh water. And the smaller size means it gets extra special care from the water pixies that take care of it. Plus it doesn’t have to travel as far, so it’s like eating honey that’s been produced by local bees: it’s way better for you. All the other suburbs get their water from Silvan, which is more commercialised and mass-produced.”