A long-time Watsonia local has claimed that the fancy new servo on our main street is symptomatic of the “inevitable gentrification” of our suburb. Darren Jensen claims the trend was allegedly set in motion by the original establishment of Watsonia’s Paris End, and the opening of a David Jones food outlet in the suburb’s main service station is just the latest step towards complete gentrification.

Speaking to The Watsonia Bugle about his detailed observations of Watsonia’s alleged transformation, Jensen said, “Service station food should just be straight-forward mediocre fare. You know, lukewarm sausage rolls that have been in the pie warmer for about 16 hours, over-priced packets of Burger Rings, and maybe one of them Krispy Kreme dispensers if you really want something fancy. But that’s where it should stop. Anything more elaborate than that is to be treated with suspicion. I’m serious.”

While Jensen struggled to pinpoint many other concrete examples of Watsonia’s so-called gentrification, he did speak in very general terms about the changes he’s seen over the last decade. He said, “It’s the little things, you know. Those subtle little changes. Before you know it, that delightfully dingy public toilet on Watsy Road opposite the shops will be transformed into one of them super fancy dunnies with the automatic doors, 10-minute pooing time limit, and the classical music playing inside. That old toilet is part of the fabric of Watsonia as we know it, and once things like that start to disappear so does the identity of the place.”