The people of Watsonia have moved quickly to anoint Mark Di Pasquale as the patron saint of Watsonia wine drinkers, following his brief mention in a recent council meeting of a wine bar opening in our suburb’s bustling CBD. Believing this their strongest chance yet to finally get a wine bar approved on Watsonia Road, local residents have championed Di Pasquale, with some now simply referring to him as “Saint Mark of the Winos”.

Despite Di Pasquale being seemingly unaware of his new status amongst the local community, the people of Watsonia have been quick to catch on. Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, local wine enthusiast Lisa McManus said, “It’s about time one of the powers that be got on board with this campaign. It’s what the people want. And it’s what the people deserve. If Saint Mark gets this over the line, he’ll be a hero for life in Watsonia. Forget the giant dim sim, we’ll build a statue of him standing triumphant on Watsonia Road with a raised glass of sauvignon blanc in his beautiful hand. Seriously.”

While the next step of this ongoing crusade seems unclear at the moment, McManus was quick to suggest this recent blessing was a sign of good things to come. She said, “Let’s face it, we’ve had a pretty rough 12 months, and all those promises that 2021 would be better than 2020 have so far proven false. But this could be it. This could be the phoenix that rises from the ashes. We need to pull something positive from the shit storm. Bless you Saint Mark. You are the hero that we both want AND deserve.”

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