Yet another brand new dish cloth has perished before its time after being used to mop up the remnants of a tomato-based pasta sauce. Despite being only a few days old, and having successfully and relatively unobtrusively cleaned up a variety of kitchen messes, the deep red pasta sauce proved to be one bridge too many to cross.

Speaking from the kitchen in her Watsonia home, Stephanie O’Connor said, “It’s just a tragedy really. I normally aim to get a good two to three weeks worth of use out of a dish cloth, but this blood-red stain looks atrocious. I might squeeze a few more days out of it, but if I’ve got guests coming over I’ll have to bin it.”

When questioned about why she didn’t just use some paper towel to mop up the obviously high risk mess, O’Connor just rolled her eyes and said, “Too soon mate. Too soon.” Our thoughts are with her during this difficult time.