A local dad has found a new place to channel his anger after stepping on LEGO pieces strewn around his house, taking aim at a national supermarket chain. George Hallifax said Woolworths’ latest loyalty scheme of handing out branded LEGO-themed pieces has resulted in higher than normal instances of him stepping on sharp plastic building blocks in his home.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, Hallifax said, “Mate, I’ve been stepping on errant pieces of LEGO for years now, and I’ve been blaming my kids for most of those injuries. I can’t blame LEGO, because they’ve brought joy to multiple generations, but now that Woolies are in on the game, they’ve been copping a pasting. It’s all ‘Argh, bloody Woolies’ and ‘Fark, Woolies you dirty dogs!’ It’s been nice to change it up a bit.”

Taking a broader view on the issue, Hallifax also questioned the effectiveness of Woolworths’ latest marketing strategy. He said, “Surely they don’t want prospective customers associating the Woolworths name with excruciating pain. Isn’t there some psychological theory about that? Pavlov’s Dog or something like that? Absolute rookies.”