A local caffeine addict has lodged a missing person report for the giant coffee cup dude that once danced his way to fame on the side of Greensborough Highway, and entertained tens of thousands of motorists in the process. Despite a confirmed high level of job satisfaction, exclusively reported by The Watsonia Bugle in June last year, the cup has not been seen for some time, causing widespread concern across the Diamond Valley for his welfare.

Watsonia coffee aficionado Lisa Blundell lodged the report with authorities yesterday due to her growing anxiety over the welfare of such a beloved local character. She told us, “I never actually met the cup, but I feel like he was part of my life. I used to toot him each morning and he’d always wave back. I mean, I loved that guy, and I want him back in my life.”

Our own preliminary investigations have yet to reveal any credible leads, so we’ll wait with the rest of you to see the outcome of the lodging of the report. Blundell said that while she wasn’t getting her hopes up, she just wants answers. She said, “I just want to know that he’s okay”.