Michael Clarke was reportedly happy not to have to hang around the SCG tonight to sing the team song at the conclusion of the Test series between Australia and India. Rather than stick around at the world-famous stadium for a few post-series drinks, Clarke was reportedly keen to hit up the bright lights of Sydney to see what a Monday night in the curfew-strangled city could offer him.

However, Clarke’s confident assertations that he was happy to leave the venue and head out for the night with friends seem to be contradicted by a number of factors. Firstly, Australia did not win the Test Match or the series, ruling out any chance of the team’s victory song being sung. Secondly, Clarke is no longer part of the side anyway (despite a casual suggestion last year that he’d be willing to comeback and save Australian cricket) meaning he wouldn’t have been invited into the circle for a song. Thirdly, Clarke was noticeably not even a member of any commentary team during the series, despite new broadcasting arrangements resulting in a plethora of job opportunities for former players and cricket experts.

Despite heavy evidence to the contrary, the fact-focussed former Australian captain insisted that he was happy to be a free man this evening, last seen slipping into his slick sports car for the quick trip into Sydney’s CBD for a nice cold glass of bubbly. Meanwhile, Channel 7 commentary team member Simon Katich was last seen entrenched in the broadcasting area, beer in hand, closely monitoring the comings and goings of his new teammates. One Channel 7 insider told The Watsonia Bugle that everyone was too scared to be the first to leave, instead opting to stay onsite until Katich said it was okay to do so.