As long-time residents of the Diamond Valley, we felt well-qualified to compile the definitive top 10 things that make you a bogan. But then scientist from a local university went and conducted extensive research on the topic, throwing qualified data and evidence behind their claims.

They surveyed over 3000 residents of Melbourne in an attempted to analyse the behaviours and lifestyles that give the clearest indication of boganism. At the completion of that research, the scientists released this list:

  1. Wearing your sunglasses on the top of your head… especially at night.
  2. Owning, or wanting to own, a dog with a tortoise shell coat.
  3. Living in Greensborough.
  4. Viewing sneans as a viable fashion option.
  5. Having the image of a car as your Facebook profile and/or cover pic.
  6. Barracking for Collingwood.
  7. Jim Beam. Just that.
  8. Wishing Ed Hardy was still making apparel.
  9. Naming one of your children after an AFL footy player.
  10. Saying “Phwoar, that’s cool” when you see a stretch Hummer drive past.

So, how did you go? Bogan much?

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