An exciting new mobile app has been launched to help nosey locals monitor police helicopter whereabouts and motives more closely. Responding to the overwhelming demand currently evident on community Facebook pages, the app intends to provide real-time information about where the seemingly omnipresent aircraft is at all times, in addition to fuelling wild speculation about why it is in that specific area.

Potentially the most revolutionary tool in suburban snooping since the introduction of the Neighbourhood Watch program in the 1980s, the “Chopper Watch” app is expected to be available on both iPhone and android devices from the beginning of next week. Web developers behind the soon-to-be-essential mobile tech say they’ve been working for months to fine tune the accuracy of the app. A spokesperson for the group said, “We’ve been poring over years of data to get the most accurate picture of how and why the police helicopter does the rounds over suburban Melbourne. And that in-depth data analysis has included getting bots to crawl the comments section of community Facebook pages. Sadly, we had to retire those bots after what they’d seen. It was pretty intense.”

However, all the hard work seems to have paid off, with the developers claiming they were able to narrow their answers down to three main areas. The spokesperson said, “Locating the helicopter is easy enough. I mean, there’s flight tracker data for that, plus quite a lot of anecdotal reporting. But the reasons for being in the area seemed quite complex at first, before we started to identify trends. Sophisticated mapping software narrowed the helicopter’s motives down to three main reasons: 1. Monitoring a traffic incident. 2. Trying to catch bad guys. 3. Helping Facebook increase their user activity. And once we implemented those umbrellas, we realised that – apart from the third reason – the helicopter is simply doing its job. It’s really that simple.”

Head to your app store from early next week to download this incredible piece of mobile technology.

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