A local Elvis impersonator is claiming that he’s recently changed the lyrics to hit song “In The Ghetto” to reference the alleged crime spree currently sweeping through Watsonia. A veteran of over 300 performances across Australia, part-time impressionist Dave Samuels said he plans on using the new lyrics when doing shows in the northern suburbs of Melbourne, hoping to get a few cheap laughs from the audience.

Speaking exclusively to The Watsonia Bugle, Samuels said, “What can I say, I’m an entertainer that lives to thrill his audience. Adding a few in-jokes to my show always goes down well with the fans. So if I starts that track with a bit of ‘On a cold and grey Watsonia morning…’ I’ll have them eating out of my hands in no time. Haha, classic.”

Funnily enough, this is not the first time Watsonia’s supposed “ghetto” status has been debated, with a similar theme permeating the local area just over two years ago. As is often the case, questions are being asked whether crime has actually increased in the local area, or the combined forces of increased domestic CCTV use and active community pages on social media simply mean we’re hearing more about incidents that occur in our area. When the same topic was discussed in 2019, rumours circulated that a new series of Blue Heelers would be based in our suburb, due to us leap-frogging Mount Thomas to become the crime capital of Victoria. However, in the absence of hard empirical data, we’ll hold off on writing off Watsonia as an out-of-control crime hot spot. For now.